The Goodbye Completion letter is meant to be written and then read. The letter is to be read to anyone other than the person, place, thing or event that is the cause of this present pain. It is to help you process your pain, and is not meant to change others. While it is addressed to another, you do not send it to that person.
I will describe the steps of the letter. I suggest people attempt to get in touch with feelings verses the many angles of the story.
Anger
I'm angry about _____________
I'm angry that you did or didn't____________
When you did ____________ I felt angry. Add in all the angry events, all the unspoken communications.
Sadness
I'm sad about _________.
I'm sad when I think about_____________ (all the sadness unspoken communications).
Hurt
When you did _________ I felt hurt.
Hurt is more vulnerable than anger so remember you are safe to tell the truth.
Amends
A statement of the part you played in each event.
I make amends for my anger when I __________________.
Forgiveness
Forgive them for whatever they did. (Remember this is your work about the part you played)
Thank you
Thank them for whatever they did for you that was positive, good or lessons they helped you learn.
Goodbye
You may be saying goodbye to a person, place, a feeling or a grudge.
One may go over the letter more times as other things come up remembering to say goodbye at the end of each communication.
When you are finished, you may burn it, throw it away, or file it away to help you process the feelings.
From Michael Yeager Contemporary Teaching
email: michael@ceuinfo.com web: http://www.contemporaryteaching.com
And in him you too are being built
together to become a dwelling in which
God lives by his Spirit.
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Andrea A. Russell, Ph.D
Arizona Licensed Psychotherapist
